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What NOT to do with Your Man

Updated: Aug 19, 2022

Most of us were taught how to relate to the opposite sex by watching our parents interact with one another. Are your parents still together or did they get a divorce? If your parents are still together, congratulations. I know there are some happy couples out there. More likely than not, most couples are working through some kind of dysfunction due to the traumas we all experience in life.

In all likelihood, we are not handling one another's heart with the utmost care. You can probably benefit from a couple of sessions with a relationship counselor. We all make mistakes and we say or do things that we wish that we can take back.

Here are the 5 Biggest Mistakes Women Make With Men:

1) Women sacrifice who they are, thus, losing their identity.

2) Women fall in love with a man's potential.

3) Women cover up their excellence.

4) Women give up their power.

5) Women act like little girls in order to get what they want from men.


Women sacrifice who they are, thus losing their identity.

Don't give up your interests and hobbies. If you like gardening, keep planting seeds. If you like baking, make that man a cake. If you like to paint, keep creating. It's simple. GOD gave everyone talents. What's yours? Get to it. GOD gave it to you for a reason.


Women fall in love with a man's potential.

The root of the problem is that we have expectations that inevitably hurt us. Nothing is worse than falling in love with the idea of a man who becomes someone else than what we imagined. In reality, your man will always be something more or less than what we initially expected. Even the most prophetic thoughts about a person may not be fulfilled. It's important to get to know someone before jumping into a marriage. It takes time to get to know the real man.


Women cover up their excellence.

I hope you believe that GOD put something excellent on the inside of you because He did. Everyone gets GOD-given talents that they have at birth. You just have to tap in to what your talent is. Whatever GOD blessed you with, it is excellent. Are you putting your excellence on display? Are you an award-winning writer? Are you an excellent homemaker? Do you praise Him excellently? Do you help others in excellence? Whatever you do, shine. Your man will love you more. Today's man wants a woman who is excellent.


Women give up their power.

Alice Walker said “the most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” Women in particular tend to fall into this trap. Women have power in the household because we run the house. Think about it. Although the man is the head of the house, women influence what is going on in the house because we are managing the household. Women are in politics, businesses, and communities pulling it all together, adding our influence to society-at-large as well. Don't give away your power. Stand firm in who you are and your capabilities.


Women act like little girls in order to get what they want from men.

Some women will swear that acting like a little girl is their superpower. Women all over the world talk in their baby voice to get what they want from a man. Stop it! You may get what you want but you diminish your power in general when you act like a little girl with your man. You may be asking right now,"How so"? Well, let me inform you: When you speak in your little whiny voice or act confused when you're not or act naive or ignorant when you really know the truth, you lose respect points from your man. Yes, all of this makes your man feel smart, needed, and important, but he really loses respect for you as a person. Your man won't respect you enough on important decisions that affect the both of you or your family because you have already shown him that you are incapable of acting like an adult and that you are ignorant and confused all the time. In time, your man will resent you because what he really wants is a partner not another child. Women do themselves a disservice by acting like a weak, helpless little girl instead of a grown-up woman.

Like most women, I've done all of these things to win over a man but they have all harmed me. I'm just telling you what I know--not what I heard. It's hard to break bad habits but I hope one day the woman I'm referring to in this blog realizes that this behavior is not helping her. The best advice I have ever received out of church was "stay true to yourself." Please, stay true to yourself. You're worth it!

Here I am purposely engaged in living an inspired life.


Rachel Mason

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