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Give Your Self-Esteem A Boost

Updated: Apr 1, 2022

An attack on your self-esteem is an attack on your purpose. You were born for a purpose. Anytime you find yourself wallowing in your insecurity you are off track from your purpose. If you are deviating from your purpose, you need to stop to do a self-inventory and align up with your purpose.

How do you know your purpose? Some people seem to come out the womb knowing their purpose. Most people find themselves looking for their purpose in the dense wilderness. If you are one of those people lost in the wilderness, you can find your purpose. Your purpose is in your pain.

What do you like to do? Do you find yourself giving advice to people? You may be a counselor. Do you like the arts? You may be able to channel your pain into your chosen art form such as a visual artist, writer, or actor. Is education important to you? Do people listen to you? You may be a teacher. By now, you know where I am going. Find your purpose.

I was sexually abused when I was a virgin. This is my pain. Therefore, I studied abuse issues throughout my schooling. I also volunteered at Children's Aid Society. I did outreach at the girl's juvenile facility here in Michigan. I also helped abuse survivors in Law School at the Family Law Clinic. My first job out of law school was at The Women's Justice Center helping women and children coming out of their abusive environments.

There are ways to turn your pain into your purpose. But the first thing you must do is get your self-esteem out of the garbage. These are the things you can do to give yourself a self-esteem boost:

  1. Listen to Uplifting Music--Your mind-chatter tells you that you are worthless. It tells you that you are a failure. It tells you that you are a bad person. My advice to you is to tell that devil to shut up and get out of your mind. I play soft Christian music or gospel music. I play r & b music that celebrates women. I do what I need to do to get that devil out of my head. I made a playlist on Spotify that celebrated womanhood. I listened to Beyonce, Janet Jackson, Chaka Kahn, and Nina Simone.

  2. Let Go of Negative People--Sometimes you have to cut people out of your life. You know the people I'm talking about; the people who make sure you feel bad about yourself every time they see you.

  3. Act As If--Act as if you are the person that you want to become. You may want to look better. Make yourself over--work out. Act as if you are confident until you are confident. I suffered with severe anxiety. I forced myself to take acting classes. I even appeared as an extra in some major movies such as Sparkle, Have A Little Faith, 5 Year Engagement, etc. I was terrified when the camera hit me but I acted as if I was cool. That's not an easy thing to do but I did it. Yea me!!!

  4. Congratulate Yourself for Your Accomplishments--Celebrate you for a job well done. Celebrate you for your self-control. Celebrate yourself for your kindness despite evil people.

  5. Get Logical--It's basically a cause and effect relationship. If you keep harping on the negative from your past, you will keep feeling bad and you will enhance the negativity from your past. Flip the script. Start thinking about all the things that you are grateful for. I am even encouraging you to start a gratitude journal or a gratitude jar.

  6. Sort Out Things--Make a list of the things you can and cannot change. Pray to GOD to handle the things that you cannot change. Then, look at the things you can change and design a roadmap to change them. Pray to GOD to help you.

The Alcoholic Anonymous community has a prayer that I prayed numerous times:


Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Be courageous. Be brave. Be humble. Be kind. Be strong. Be vulnerable. Last but not least, be you!

Here I am purposely engaging in living an inspired life!


Rachel Mason